Freebsd Fortunes 4: 661 of 2327 |
I suppose that in a few hours I will sober up. That's such a sad
thought. I think I'll have a few more drinks to prepare myself.
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 662 of 2327 |
"I suppose you expect me to talk."
"No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die."
-- Goldfinger
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 663 of 2327 |
I tell them to turn to the study of mathematics, for it
is only there that they might escape the lusts of the flesh.
-- Thomas Mann, "The Magic Mountain"
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 664 of 2327 |
I tell ya, drugs never worked out for me. The first time I tried smoking
pot I didn't know what I was doing. I smoked half the joint, got the
munchies, and ate the other half.
Well, the first time I tried coke I was so embarrassed. I kept getting the
bottle stuck up my nose.
-- Rodney Dangerfield
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 665 of 2327 |
I tell ya, gambling never agreed with me. Last week I went to the track
and they shot my horse with the opening gun.
Well, just last week I was at a Chinese restaurant and when I opened my
fortune cookie I found the guy's check sitting at the next table. I said,
"Hey, buddy, I got your check", he said, "Thanks."
-- Rodney Dangerfield
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 666 of 2327 |
I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt
the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off,
I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.
-- Rodney Dangerfield
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 667 of 2327 |
I tell ya, I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly that my dad
kept the kid's picture that came with the wallet he bought.
-- Rodney Dangerfield
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 668 of 2327 |
I think... I think it's in my basement... Let me go upstairs and check.
-- Escher
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 669 of 2327 |
I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward
or it dies. Well, what we have on our hands here is a dead shark.
-- Woody Allen
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Freebsd Fortunes 4: 670 of 2327 |
I think all right-thinking people in this country are sick and tired of
being told that ordinary, decent people are fed up in this country with being
sick and tired. I'm certainly not! But I'm sick and tired of being told
that I am!
-- Monty Python
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